New Town or New Stage of Life? This one is for you!**And if you have a low-stakes, high-upside example to share, please tell us in the comments or email me.** How refreshing to hear a story of new friends who met at the post office! Yes, people still strike up low-stakes conversations in public then exchange numbers. (That’s a high upside!) HOWEVER, like any social experience that ends in this positive way, someone has to take the first step and also not be staring at their phones. This week’s “Dear Nina” episode features Lisa Giordano, who at 31 moved across the country all while documenting her goal to build a social life and community from scratch. Single, working a remote job, and ready for an adventure after spending her entire life on the East Coast, Lisa packed up her car and set out for Austin. In our conversation, Lisa gives a master class in what I’d call “friend-making micro-courage.” She shares examples of how she put herself out there to make friends (and continues to do so). She also shares how others were brave and asked for her number or showed up in the DMs of her social media accounts. Each of these moments of connection required someone to show a little courage! Friendship does not “just happen.” We make it happen. The post office exampleYou’ll hear more “low stakes, high upside” examples from Lisa on the episode, but this one is my favorite: Lisa was at the post office waiting for longer than usual when a woman in the same predicament asked if they should ring the bell. Lisa noticed the woman was sporting a Yankees cap. Instead of retreating into her phone, Lisa offered a single curiosity-driven question: “Are you from New York?” Within minutes they were swapping cross-country-move stories, exchanging numbers, and planning coffee. That’s it. One question about the hat, one moment of courage from both Lisa and this stranger, and a new local friendship was born. (Yes, they did indeed become friends.) Listen to episode 155, “Thriving Solo: Making Friends and Creating Community After a Big Move”Find Lisa on Instagram and TikTok. FIND EPISODE #155 on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, and anywhere you listen to podcasts! Articles and Other Finds About FriendshipI see so many friendship-related things (or I am quoted in them). You all send me great links too. I love hearing from listeners and readers!
Books, Shows, Recipes I’m Into These Days
Two anonymous friendship advice questions & answers you might have missed
Let’s connect outside of this newsletter: You can find me most often in the Facebook group, Dear Nina: The Group. All the social media links are below. I know I need to get rid of some them! Instagram | TikTok | YouTube | LinkedIn | Threads | Twitter | My Website THANK YOU TO Twisted Alchemy cold-pressed juices—THIS WEEK’S DEAR NINA SPONSOR.
I cannot rave enough about Twisted Alchemy’s cold-pressed juices! I’ve cooked with the lemon juice and made cocktails for friends (and family) with several of the other options. Visit https://www.twistedalchemy.com/#dearnina and use code NINA25 at checkout to receive 25% off orders $75 or more, plus free shipping. Find info about sponsoring Dear Nina episodes and newsletter posts here.Links to Amazon, Bookshop.org, or other affiliates might earn me a tiny commission, which helps operations of Dear Nina. You’re a free subscriber to Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. Frustrated with some of your friends? You’re not alone! The anonymous letters are a perk for paying subscribers. You probably have a similar question. Upgrade any time for the full archive AND for (optional!) quarterly Zoom hangouts with Nina and other paying subscribers.
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Wednesday, 16 July 2025
A New Friend at the Post Office: Low-stakes, High-upside
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