Tears come
When I know I've struck truth
Lying on the floor
Reading through journal entries
Penned a lifetime ago
With dry ink words remain
The voice of the same old heart
No longer masked by pain
I've changed
Malibu you've seen me grow
A crescent moon at twilight
You've seen me break you've seen
Me run you've seen me fall
You caught me in your web of time
Knowing one day that I'd find
A light disguised as pain
Feel the magic in the wind
Magic in my veins
Residual from childhood
Surface now as
Winds of change
Blow
I never stopped walking
Guided by an inner glow
That burned brighter
In my fear
Burned brighter as I walked toward
This place called home
An inner knowing the pain was showing
How to listen to crashing waves and
Breathe in the falling sun
When what I loved I lost
The rising tide brought peace of mind
Each step in soft brown sand
Malibu you've watched me turn
A boy into a man
And now that I return to you
To tell about the world I've seen
And understand the pain in me I watch
An evanescent sun take an
Evanescent part of me
I wonder as I
Welcome night
If I'm ready to let go
To these questions with no
Answers
Can I move on
Burn away that part of me
Without feeling like I've lost
A piece no longer seen
Sitting in the morning drinking coffee
Scared that my past is nothing but
A memory
What does it mean
To say goodbye to what consumed me
Am I afraid to let go
Who am I without the embers
That kept the universe lit
At least then it was on fire
Who am I without it
Can I watch the pain diminish
Emerge from the ashes
As the future and the past
Seeking peace in the present flame
Warmed by tears like summer rain
How to make sense of the
Life I've known shaking
Time goes and we go with it
Like holding
Rushing river water or
Floating with the tide
To feel time move
It's all in the book
Two halves of me bound by
This smooth leather cover
Attuned to my hand
What carried me through years of pain
Were thoughts of things
I still don't understand
Like bare feet on the concrete and
Conversations with strangers seated
Side-by-side on seaside trains
That passage from June found me
Flipping through the pages of this small black book
When the pale sky and sound of motorbikes
Reminded me there's light inside
In July I broke down crying
Back against the wall on the
Side of the road
Surrounded by flowers dying
So I sat with them
As if I was dying too
I was just learning how to break so light
Might shine through
Like cracks in the pavement
Where dying flowers bloom
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